A Word of Advice... on graduation

By Joshua O'Connell
Posted Monday, April 7, 2003

Last week, you had a letter about a student who was struggling to find a job with graduation right around the corner. I'm a junior, and that makes me a bit nervous. Any suggestions on how I can get a leg up right now?

--Will work for food

Juggle on a street corner with a monkey playing with a jack-in-the-box.

Or, you could try some of the following options:

Visit your career planning center for information on how to make a resume, what companies are recruiting on your campus, and so on.
Find an internship sometime between now and the time you graduate. Do more than one if you can. They'll know you, you'll know them, and everyone will know how to work together (or discover they can't, whatever the case may be).
Work over the summer, and save some money. Key point, as if you have to go a month or two without a job, at least you'll have money in the bank. If you work during the school year, keep building on that. If you do find a job, you still may need a little extra for the first/last month's rent plus deposit for an apartment, or money towards a used car, and so on. The more saved, the better, but I'm sure that won't be a problem - you don't really need to own every season of Friends on DVD right now, right?

Beyond that, interview early and often. Those who get a job earlier will be more likely to have a better paying job. Also, it'll allow you to breathe easy while you watch your friends run around to 20 interviews a week in April of next year. You can sit on the couch, point and laugh. If a job doesn't come early, despite your best efforts, don't worry. There are always other options - graduate school is a popular route for some, and others broaden their search to areas they hadn't thought of, but where their education comes in handy. You knew you took those core courses for some reason! The economy is making things a little more stressful for people, but there's also the chance it could turn around before next May, so do what you can, but don't let it get to you. Let your friends have that pleasure.

I'm a junior, and have been interested in dating this senior guy for a bit now. I think he's interested in me too. We've known each other for a year or so. The problem is that school ends in just over a month. Is it worth exploring?

--Single female loves sexy seniors

Anything's worth exploring… even the mystery meat at the cafeteria. Of course, you'll determine very quickly whether you like it or not.

The key is you both realize what you're getting into right up front, and say to each other "Let's give this a shot, and if we can't deal with the circumstances out of graduation, no hard feelings, eh?" Keep in mind that there are tons of different ways that these things can work out - he could end up living close by, you could visit each other on a regular basis, you might end up living where he is at the end of your senior year, etc.

There's plenty o' chances to work this out. A friend of mine has been in a long distance relationship since she left her study abroad session last December, and sees her significant other once or twice a month, talks on the phone or online each day, and overall seems very happy. I don't see why it can't work, but it takes a special kind of commitment.

What do you have going for you in this circumstance? You've known the guy for a year, which means you already know to a degree how each other operates. You'll have a month actually together. You have a summer vacation where you'll probably have the chance to get out and see him, along with breaks-a-million thanks to the college school year calendar.

What's against you? Space and lots of it, depending on where he gets a job and how expensive it is to get there. Take: don't give up your life, or make him give up his, to move to one town if you won't be able to get along once you end up together. If you can't seem to be able to handle each other when you're away, avoid the trap that being together will solve the problems. It won't. Only do something like that if the relationship is strong, you both can be happy where you end up, and both of you can live the lives you wanted to, whether it be as a househusband (the slowly growing male version of the housewife), or the CEO of Enron or WorldCom.

But the old phrase is generally true: It is better to have loved and lost, then to never have loved at all. I've probably butchered that phrase somehow, but hopefully you won't butcher your chance at what could be a great relationship. Good luck, and thanks for asking.

Got a question? Just ask. You could see your question published in a future column with an answer from Josh!

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